Drop Outs!!!

Today, as I read about Steve Jobs and found that he is also a drop out from Reed college, I was surprised! Some of the successful people I know who are also college drop outs are Bill Gates, Michael Dell and Mukesh Ambani. 

I believe they dropped out from the college, not just to pursue something that interests them. More than an interest, it should be their deep hearted passion, otherwise they would not have become so successful. On giving a profound thinking about drop outs and sincere academic student (like me!!!), I understand that earlier ones follow their hearts and brains, while later ones (yes, like me) follow what is told by others! 

Yes, I have always been asked to do something at school and college, and I did it good and gave my best. Even at my job, I was assigned some work and I was able to complete it. Though the companies welcome their employees to do some hobby projects, the primary mode of working is still "Assignment".  Little did I do myself, like taking photos and making videos. It is more like a hobby, but I have to accept that my passion is dwindling these days.. I am not passionate enough to throw away my job and take my passion as a job!

When I started working at Nokia, where the work is more liberal and employees are encouraged to take up tasks from a work pool, rather than being assigned, I was quite staggered. It was a completely new experience for me. It took some months for me to understand how I can contribute myself to the team, by knowing what I can do, how I can involve my skill to solve the problems in hand and what I can learn to increase my participation. Thats the scrum way of doing things. But to be honest, I am still learning those soft skills.

Besides, I remember at home, my parents and grandma always used to say, do it on your own and don't wait for someone to tell you. These dialogues usually pop up, when they see me near some messy place(usually my clothes and book shelves) or some cluttered room. I am citing this event, to insist that "doing by yourself" attitude can be cultivated at home also. But only when an individual realizes it, and practises it, he can blossom into a successful person. I have realized it only now and its not too late for me to practise it.

And before I end this post, I have to tell that it is not easy to follow your dreams and being passionate. 

I am sure many of us do day-dream, 

and some of them want to pursue it,

and only some take steps to pursue it,

and only few of them are able to proceed with it,

and only few of them are successful in it,

and only very few could withstand the downtimes and pursue it all the time! 

Like Steve Jobs, who had been thrown out of his own company, after many years, came back as its CEO again..

I am reminded of a Bhagavat Geetha Shloka here. Lord Krishna says in Chapter 7, Sloka 3,

Out of many thousands of men, hardly one endeavors for the perfection of self-realization, and of those so endeavoring hardly, only one has achieved the perfection of self-realization and of those hardly one knows Me in truth.

Yes, all of us need persistence and determination to realize our passion. As always, I am all ears to your thoughts about this post and its only our exchange of views gives us more clarity!

Words from me....

When you are in the course of not-so-good times, where most of the things happens as you don't expect, we might get frustrated.


But believe me, it prepares you, both emotionally and intellectually, to face the worse with courage and determination.

Appreciation - is it wasted all around or a valuable!

Nowadays I hear many people mentioning that their works are not recognized properly and they are not getting their due appreciation. Whenever I hear this, I am reminded of my Grandma.. and how worthy is her appreciation!


During my childhood, my grandma used to take care of my brother and myself at home. She is very particular about doing things on time and also very consistent in doing daily/weekly activities. She delegates some of her tasks to us and it is our responsible to do them every week. We both do it sincerely (ofcourse I do escape sometimes ;-)), but she never used to dote us and rarely she mentions about how good we do our tasks. But, I still remember vividly, how proudly she was telling to our neighbour aunty about the way we oblige to her and do our tasks. That is her way of appreciation. And, sometimes when we perform above her expectations, she immediately appreciates us and tell our parents.


I could understand now, that it is the better approach. Because if she would have praised us for whatever we do, we would have settled with that, and never would have attempted to do better. Also, we would have been doing them only to get praises from her, and that might be the triggering factor! But because of her approach, we wanted to do our tasks better for the sake that they would be better and not for some praises or prices!


Also she used to say that we have to perform the same way, when we are being observed or not.. Because I used to skip some activities, when she is not around ;-). This kind of brought up, inculcated in us good work ethics like doing our best always and without expecting appreciation.


I hope and would try my best to inculcate them to Barathraam also.. For these qualities are easy for kids to imbibe rather than adults. For adults, I believe these qualities can be acquired only with their self interest and discipline and not from others words.

Festivals.. Juhla

We had a pikku-joulu (pre-christmas party) in our location for kids. Its the first time for me to be in such a party and yes also for Barathraam.
The candle lights, aroma, christmas tree, the christmas food and yes the most important our finnish friends gave us a warm welcome. Barathraam enjoyed roaming around and it was nice to see our finnish friends preparing Christmas food and decorations. They made paper decorations for the Christmas tree and the younger ones decorated them on the tree. I could recollect it with our Pongal, Deepaavali celebrations wherein we decorate our houses in our similar way.


Once a considerable number of people joined, they just invited everyone to help themselves with the Finnish Christmas foods like Glogi, Rice Puuro(porridge) and fruits soup (hedelmä keittö) . I suddenly realized that we are missing something here!
Yes, offering to God. In our culture, it has been a key activity to offer the food, decorations like flowers, lamps to God, before we take ourselves. What is significance about it? It signifies that whatever we do, we submit it to God. On a philosophical note, saints used to say,
"I cannot say I offer flowers to you, for I cannot produce flowers
I cannot say I offer food to you, for I cannot produce the grains
I cannot say I offer fruits to you, for I cannot produce fruits
Flowers, Grains, Fruits and all are produced by You, my Lord
I am only an instrument offering it to You."


As a child, I used to wait for the moment when my father does "Neivedhyam" (offering to God), after which I can taste all the different foods prepared for that festival. I do not know the reasonings behind it, but now when I could realize the meaning of these rituals, I can wait till God tastes them :) There is also a time, when I often question my mother, why we are doing so many different foods? Is it because we like them and just roping Festivals and Gods as a reason? To a person who sees things without insight, the answer might be YES. Yes, for me too. But once I started introspecting about that, I could understand that God likes creativity, beauty and innovation. Nature stands as a simple beautiful example for that. The activities that we do gets more beauty when we put some extra effort in making it perfect, isn't it? Be it cooking, the whole recipe looks delicious not only with its taste but also on the way it is served. So preparing different kinds of foods for festivals makes up the festive spirit and preparing it with a mindset of offering to God adds up the real taste of the food! My mother also used to say, that the reason behind having certain foods, decorations during certain festivals, is based on the availability of food items during that particular season so that the farmers and other merchants gets benefited. That is sensible and a human value perception.


Our festivals stand out from others, only in this aspect of offering it to God. It inculcates in every being, be it a child or an animal, इश्वर समर्पण मनोभाव (ஈஸ்வர சமர்பன மனோபாவம்) - The best English word that matches this emotion in Sanskrit is "Submitting to God mentality". For us, festivals are "celebration offering to God in all aspects".

Accept it!

Sometimes in our life, we do not get a choice.
We have to accept what life bestows to us.
We may not like it!

But only when we accept it, it turns better from worse and
gives us the strength to make most out of the situation!

-- Words from Me

Standup Arjuna!

"Standup Arjuna! for you are a king and you have some responsibilities that you ought to do. Normal people look up to their kings and respectable people, and inherit values from them. So it is very important for a king to uphold good values not only for his goodness, but also for the goodness of his people. If you stumble, then it would shudder the moral strength of your citizens also."

Krishna thus says to Arjuna, how important and significant it is for a Leader to adher to values and dharma. These days, I am reiterating myself with these words and draw inspiration. I have not become a leader now, but I am now a mother. Mother of a baby who turns to me for everything he does and need. He watches me closely and looks up to me. Indeed I might think that he does not understand my emotions and actions. If I would have thought it that way, I am totally wrong.
He does understand my smile, anger, and even my intonations. I am sure he would learn a lot from me and hence I am a Leader to him :)

I have taken myself a woe, that I have to be strong physically and emotionally even during these tough times and make him understand that "Whatever happens is a passing cloud. With a right attitude and faith in God we can remain as a sky undeterred by those passing clouds". Once in a while I do fell back, but I remind myself that being a mother I should not submit, but stand up!

I pass on this message to you, who is a leader for someone known or unknown, and going through testing times - "Stand up, be strong and do your best, for it's only that you can do and rest is God's will"

Being a mother...

Being a mother gives you a special feeling.. We have always been taken cared of or cajoled by someone all these days.. For the first time in your life, this little baby loves and needs all your care.. This is a very special mother's feeling and we pamper our baby.. It seems as though he is our utmost priority and everything else comes second. You enjoy their pranks and yes, to be true, sometimes it does make you frustrated. Especially when you are taking care of him alone. Sometimes, losing our patience we might even scold them. The wonderful thing to appreciate and learn from them is, they "forget everything"! Yes they forget that Mom scolded and smile at us the next moment and wants us to hold them. :) Children indeed are gifted to have this character. Infact, we humans have them innate.. its just that as we grow, we get transformed and slowly lose it. I am remembered of a famous Tamil song குழந்தையும் தெய்வமும் குணத்தால் ஒன்று (kulanthayum deivamum gunathal ondru) Yes, this is also the song which I sang in my childhood and got some prize. My mother always says that she spent so many days making me sing that song... As I told earlier children "forget everything" and I have forgot how much she struggled with me.. :) Ah, this makes me think why youngsters don't appreciate or respect their parents affection! May be they "forgot everything" that how they have been grown up by their parents.
Okie, let me not diverge from what I intended to write in this post..

I thought I could scribble some of my experiences that might be valuable inputs for someone..

• First thing I would say is don't ever practise your baby to fall asleep after drinking milk. It will be seriously difficult to make them sleep otherwise.. Most importantly they will not sleep in your absence and also refuse to take any other milk in the later months.. Give them milk sometime before they go to sleep and put them to sleep in someway that suits you both.
• You can eat some ayurvedic legiyam (paste) that helps promoting secretion of breast milk. The breast milk usually gets scant after 2 or 3 months.. so it is a good idea to start consuming it earlier.
• It is a good idea to give breast/formula milk or water to the babies from the initial days using bottles. This helps to inculcate the habit of drinking from bottles. Though you might think that it might not be needed initially, in the later months some babies refuse to drink from bottles. And, this is the mistake I did!
• It is a good practice to keep them on the floor most of the time and hold them only when they cry or want to.. Don't ever hold them because you like it or they love it.. Babies always loves to be carried on.. But this will hinder their development progress and also you will see from 9 months the techniques they use to make you carry..  It is very important that you keep them on the floor after 5 months for they start learning to turn around, roll, crawl, sit, stand etc..
• If you are planning to send your baby to daycare, then it is a good idea to know the habits they follow beforehand. Habits like using potty,  eating habit, drinking habit, sleeping habit etc. This would really help the babies to accustom themselves with the daycare easily.
• Once babies start taking solids, I am sure that all mothers like their babies to be fed by them. Also babies like the same way. But from my experience, I would strongly recommend that its a good idea to practice feeding solids and formula milk by other close ones like Father, or grannies.. It is in fact true that during initial days they resist to eat and in some cases eat less when they are fed by others, but the practice makes it slowly better. This really help in future, when you are planning to send your baby to daycare or you have to join office back or you could not feed them for some reason!
• After seeing children in the daycare, I would say the best habit that we inculcated to Barathraam is sleeping without dummies or pacifiers (tutti in Finnish). I felt bad when I saw a 2 year old needing a dummy to sleep. While babies innately like to taste their fingers, it was during 3-4 months they develop a strong tendency to suck the fingers. We gently diverted his attention from sucking and yes, its a bit difficult. He cried many times in the night and we pacified him somehow and yes, sometimes we did use the dummies (sometimes in the night and while he is inside pram). But not always. At the end of 5th month, his liking towards sucking gradually reduced. And, after that he never wanted a dummy. I know that each baby is different, but if you spend sometime you can bring up your child without using dummies.

I will keep updating this post with my latest experiences and things to share..
I am sure that you have something useful to share. Please do pour in your thoughts.